Our preceding article explained, in brief, the key differences between commonly discussed parenting styles. Today, we look at one of them, Authoritative Parenting, in much more detail. It’s a style that’s generally well thought of amongst researchers and developmental psychologists, as well as many parents who’ve used the approach. Indeed it is a style that’s often recommended because of the way it balances empathetic nurturing with the application of rules. While it’s important to remember that there is no single ‘best’ parenting style for every situation, authoritative parenting does seem to result in very good outcomes and is thought by many to be the ‘gold standard’ for children and teens. Let’s take a deeper dive.
It’s important not to confuse authoritative parenting with authoritarian parenting. Despite the similar names, the two styles could not be more different. See our Rough Guide to Parenting Styles for a quick overview of the differences.
The Origins of Authoritative Parenting
The Authoritative Parenting model was originally developed at the University of California in 1966 by Diana Baumrind. That said, it has evolved over the decades since, with backing from developmental research. It’s a style that seems to work well for children of all ages as well as teenagers.
Exactly What is Authoritative Parenting?
The authoritative parenting style uses an age-appropriate — and finely-tuned — balance between responsiveness (towards children) and demandingness (from children).
The Responsiveness Element
The responsiveness element of authoritative parenting refers to the high levels of warmth, empathy, love, and understanding shown to the child by the parent. Authoritative parents are deeply attuned to their children’s feelings, needs, abilities, and perspectives. They gauge such things and weigh up the balance at any given time. Only then do they respond, in a way they feel is most appropriate, having borne the bigger picture in mind.
The Demandingness Element
The demandingness element of authoritative parenting refers to the level of control over and desired expectation from their child. Standards and boundaries are enforced but in a very measured, kind, and thoughtful way. Authoritative parents use a two-way communication approach to makes clear what’s expected from their children. They will discuss and explain things, often in advance. In this way, the child not only knows what to expect, but also understands why it is expected. That’s in stark contrast to some of the other parenting models that expect blind obedience without explanation.
What About Discipline?
Strong assertions of parental power and harsh discipline are seldom, if ever, used with the authoritative parenting style. If they are used, it would tend to be only as a last resort and most likely only in a ‘danger’ scenario. An example would be shouting at a child to stop them running out into a busy road.
Achievements Are Celebrated
As well as thoughtful guiding of children, their achievements, however small or large, are celebrated. In this way, positive outcomes are used to further encourage children to continue using a good approach and appropriate behaviour.
Key Elements of Authoritative Parenting:
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Likely Outcomes for Children Raised Through Authoritative Parenting
Compared to children raised via other parenting styles, children and adolescents raised through an authoritative parenting approach have very favourable outcomes. This has been backed up by many studies. For starters, they usually perform better academically and are well-motivated to succeed. They are often creative, take the initiative, and are highly curious intellectually. They’re self-reliant and independent, with good self-control and a good awareness of appropriate boundaries. Risk assessment is good. They also tend to be happy, have better mental health, and good emotional regulation. They also have good social skills, are respectful to others, and have a healthy level of self-esteem. They have a healthy level of connection to both friends and parents. Studies also find that children raised by authoritative parents are less likely to go on to misuse drugs or alcohol. It’s a comprehensive suite of benefits.
Are There Any Pitfalls of Authoritative Parenting?
There are few, if any, pitfalls to well-executed authoritative parenting. Perhaps the only consideration relates to the amount of focus, effort, and consistency required on the part of the parents. While such a balance is totally feasible in the most part, perhaps on extra-busy, tiring, or stressful days, one could be forgiven for letting things slip a little.
Final Thoughts
Any parenting style(s) may, of course, require continual adjustment because life seldom travels in a straight, predictable line. For example, when it comes to authoritative parenting, sometimes the balance between warmth and expectations may need to tilt more in one direction than the other. This could be because of a specific scenario. One that involves an urgent safety concern would be a classic example. At other times, however, the balance between the two may tilt back the other way because the situation has changed. In essence, it all comes back to the balance between ‘responsiveness’ and ‘demandingness’ that we discussed earlier. Indeed, it is a fine balance, and it’s not always possible to get it 100% right; parenting is challenging and, at the end of the day, we can only do our best in the circumstances that life throws at us.
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Authoritative parenting is often seen as a strong, nurturing foundation for early childhood. It’s balanced somewhere between permissive parenting and authoritarian parenting.
Authoritarian parenting is a style that’s highly structured, but low in emotional flexibility. With this parenting style, parents expect blind obedience without question, don’t often explain the reasons for rules, and are highly controlling.
Gentle parenting uses a relationship-led approach that’s rooted in empathy.
Permissive parenting (sometimes also known as ‘indulgent parenting’) utilises a loving and warm approach towards children, but is often under-structured due to a reluctance to enforce rules.
Helicopter parenting means that parents are very involved — sometimes too involved — often micromanaging the child’s every move.
Velcro parenting denotes a strong level of closeness and a slow level of separation — a kind of hyper-involvement.
Uninvolved parenting (also sometimes known as ‘neglectful parenting’) is evidenced by low engagement, a low level of warmth, and limited support for the child.
Except for Safeguarding, the new Report Card will show Ofsted’s evaluation of each of the assessment areas as one of the following:
Childhood passes so quickly — a blur of breakfast times, nursery drop-offs, and bedtime stories. Yet every so often, something extraordinary happens: a moment that will light up a child’s eyes and linger in their memory for years to come. These are the magical moments that they never forget. They’re also moments that help shape how children see the world, their place within it — and sometimes even themselves.
Psychologists tell us that children build their sense of self through experiences that stir strong, positive emotions — especially awe, wonder, joy, and belonging. These feelings act as emotional anchors, shaping how safe, capable, and loved a child feels. When parents or caregivers create a moment that makes a child’s heart race or eyes widen with joy or wonder, they’re not just giving them a fun memory — they’re helping to build emotional security that lasts well into adulthood.
Magical childhood memories do not require grand holidays or costly toys. They’re far more likely to spring from connection, surprise, wonder, and imagination.
On a clear night, gently wake your child and wrap them in a blanket to watch a meteor shower or count shooting stars. Tell them about the Northern Lights, how they can wish on a star, how astronauts are planning to travel vast distances to Mars, and give them inspiration for their dreams. The quiet awe of the night sky will stay with them forever.
Leave a tiny note or drawing from the “garden fairies” or “forest pixies” thanking your child for something kind they’ve done — perhaps watering houseplants or helping a friend or sibling. It’s a simple act that blends imagination with a message of kindness and care. Perhaps take it a step further and encourage little ones to make mossy beds for the fairies, and a little home-made miniature shelter for them to sleep in. Take photos of them as a memento for your child.
Create small rituals that return every year — picking flowers in springtime to display around the home, having a “summer-solstice supper” in the garden, or putting out biscuits and carrots on Christmas Eve for Santa’s reindeer — be sure to show your little one how the carrots have been nibbled on Christmas morning! Such traditions will give children a comforting rhythm and a sense that life’s changes can be filled with fun and joy.
Pause for half an hour to watch the sunrise or sunset together, make wishes while blowing dandelion seeds into the breeze, or follow a butterfly in the park to see where it leads. These small acts teach children that magic is woven through the everyday world — they just have to stop a while and notice it sometimes.
As adults, those memories often become emotional landmarks: the glow of torchlight in a tent, the spectacle of a meteor streaking across the sky, the distinctive smell of campfire food being carried on the wind, and telling stories beneath a blanket. Such recollections help shape optimism and emotional well-being long after childhood ends. They are also the moments that, years later, children will recall fondly and still talk about.
Tantrums are a common part of life with toddlers and under-fives, but when they happen, they can be very challenging! Whether it’s a meltdown at dinner time or a dramatic on-the-floor outburst in the middle of the supermarket aisle, they can test even the most patient of parents and carers. However, it’s important to understand that tantrums aren’t a sign that something is wrong — they’re actually a normal, healthy stage of child development.
In their early years, children are still learning how to manage big emotions. There’s a mismatch, though; their brains are developing rapidly, but they haven’t yet mastered language, impulse control, or emotional regulation. So, when they’re tired, hungry, overstimulated, or frustrated, it can all become too much for them. 
When a tantrum starts, staying calm yourself is key. Your child will take emotional cues from you, their trusted adult. If you can remain steady, even if you’re feeling flustered inside, you send the message that you’re in control—and that they’re safe.
Avoid reasoning or explaining too much during a tantrum. When a child is overwhelmed, they’re unlikely to take much in. It’s often best to wait it out and stay close so they know they’re not alone. For some children, a gentle touch or hug might be helpful. Others may need a bit of space before they’re ready for comfort.
Offering limited choices — like “Would you like to wear the red jumper or the blue one?” — can also give them a sense of control without overwhelming them.
In today’s world, electronic screens are everywhere — from TVs and smartphones to tablets and games consoles. Even our youngest children are growing up in increasingly digital environments. While technology brings many conveniences, intentionally unplugging can offer profound benefits for little ones and their families. Whether it’s for a day, a weekend, a holiday, or even longer, the value gained from a ‘digital detox’ may surprise even the most dubious amongst us. Today’s post investigates.
Research consistently shows the positive effects of stepping away from our screens. Studies report that a digital detox can lead to decreased stress and anxiety, improved mood and well-being, and even better physical health through healthier, less sedentary, lifestyles. Pausing the use of electronic screens can even help reset our perception of time, making days feel longer, fuller, and more engaged.
When families go screen-free, the benefits extend well beyond the individual. Removing screens often rekindles face-to-face interactions and facilitates more laughter and unfiltered conversations within the family. Parents who’ve tried it report a renewed sense of connection and deeper engagement with their children. Even short periods of unplugging can turn into lasting changes—more shared stories, more creative play, and more real presence.
Better sleep for everyone with children tending to drop off more easily and adults feeling more rested.
Begin by designating screen-free boundaries, such as bedrooms or mealtimes, and/or set a daily screen-free hour in the evening.
The evidence clearly shows: families who have periods free of electronic screens will benefit. A digital detox enriches and elongates days. It enhances sleep quality for children and adults by facilitating their natural rhythms. Days feel more spacious and calm without digital distractions and imaginative play soon steps in and thrives. In the absence of screens, children are also likely to get outdoors more often — and benefit from everything nature and outdoor play have to offer. Mental health and even academic grades are also likely to improve when this happens.
At first glance, this devotion to a single story might seem puzzling. As adults, we crave novelty and variation, and it’s tempting to encourage children to explore new titles or gently steer them towards something ‘different’. But this desire for repetition is not only entirely normal for infants, toddlers and preschoolers — it’s actually a sign of healthy development. In fact, there’s a great deal happening beneath the surface every time your child requests a beloved book for the umpteenth time.
There is also an emotional component to repeated reading. When a child hears a favourite story in the voice of a parent or trusted adult, it creates a strong sense of connection. The warmth, tone and rhythm of familiar words spoken by someone they love reinforce a feeling of safety and belonging. For many children, this shared experience becomes part of their routine, and returning to a much-loved story can offer comfort in moments of transition, tiredness or uncertainty.
One of the clearest benefits of repeated reading is vocabulary development. Hearing the same words and phrases over time helps children internalise them. This is especially important when books introduce new or more complex language than a child might hear in everyday conversation. By encountering those words again and again in a familiar context, children begin to understand them more deeply and even start to use them in their own speech. The rhythm and rhyme found in many favourite books further support this by making the language more memorable and easier to imitate.
At home, parents or carers can support this by continuing to follow a child’s lead. If your child keeps choosing the same book, that’s a good thing — it means they’re connecting with it. You can enhance the experience by reading with enthusiasm, pausing to let your child fill in familiar lines, or asking gentle questions like “What happens next?” or “How do you think they feel here?” If your child wants to tell you the story instead, even better — this kind of role reversal strengthens memory, language, and storytelling abilities.
Eventually, children do move on. When they’ve had their fill of a particular book, they’re often ready to explore new stories with a richer set of skills in place. The comfort and confidence gained from repeated readings help them approach unfamiliar books with greater interest and less frustration. So rather than seeing repetition as a rut, it’s helpful to view it as a bridge — a way for children to move steadily from the familiar to the new.
Our practitioners are skilled at making repeated reading feel fresh and interactive, even when the story is already very familiar. By using expressive voices, gestures, and encouraging children to join in with key words or sounds, we help bring the story to life each time. Children are often invited to take on the role of storyteller themselves, turning pages, pointing to pictures, and even “reading” aloud from memory. These small but powerful moments help build confidence and strengthen communication skills in a way that feels natural and joyful.